Post by High Priestess on Sept 25, 2015 16:39:16 GMT
What to do with a disgusting guest
www.airbnb.com/groups/content/content-135080
Sara shared 9 months ago on New Hosts Forum
How to deal with a horrid guest
My first airbnb guest was actually a total nightmare. Has anyone dealt with that before? I can share details but it was worse than being messy or breaking my things. Much worse. I had to report him not only to airbnb but to the evanston police.
I have many upcoming bookings so I will continue to be a gracious, wonderful and accommodating host because I want my guests to have a beautiful stay in my home. But is there any advice out there?
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C C9 months ago
Sara, that is such a rare thing & i HATE that happened on your first reservation. When you host a lot more, you'll realize how super-nice most people are, & this will fade as a memory (although it sounds extremely dire!). I had one guest, nowhere near what you're dealing with, but she cried when she arrived because she was "scared" but then realized it was actually a good place & next refused to leave & I had to threaten her with police. But most people are good people & that's really the take-away for me with Airbnb. It has affirmed my belief in people, not ruined it. I had another just outrageously bad, legendary guest, but props to Airbnb for their support! I'm so sorry, again. Don't quit
Reply Like Delete
Gii
Gii9 months ago
That's horrible :-) hoping you are okay.
Looking at your listing I would recommend retracting the mention of how you are gone most of the time. There are some unruly guests with bad intentions and this might bait them a little. Perhaps instead mention more of what is involved in the check-in process and how you will make them feel welcome, that they have their own privacy but you are there to address anything or if they want company.
I am a young female and I think this alone can attract untoward behaviour (I've had a few bizarre requests through AirBnB!) so I communicate with guests prior to their stay to gauge the reason for the visit, whether they have used AirBnB before, and asking them to familiarise themselves with the house rules so they understand what your expectations are and the etiquette that must exist on AirBnB as a platform.
Your listing is great and I think you will attract many wonderful guests, it's just a matter of making minor adjustments in your listing and communicating with the guest more prior to their stay.
Reply Like 2 likes Delete
Gii
Gii9 months ago
Oops it wasn't supposed to be :-) it was intended to be a sad face I'm sorry
Reply Like Delete
Stan & Maggie
Stan & Maggie9 months ago
So sorry this happened :-( but well done for contacting the police! Curious to know what they did! Also was this an instant booking? My initial advice is to tweak your profile to seem less 'single' and remove the college reference,
BTW I used to live close to the original Lush store! Maggie
Reply Like Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
Thank you Cheyenne! I just knew this was an unlucky situation. He stayed up all night and jerked off. I caught him and then he messaged me hoping I would catch him again and again. Like he got off from me catching him. He left semen on my floor and I just couldn't believe this happened to me.
But I want to be a host. I want to share my home with people.
So I won't quit.
Thank you for your advice!
Reply Like 1 reply•1 like Delete
C C
C C9 months ago
Sara, i saw where u changed vamping to vaping. Where u say dont take my possessions out... change to for 'any' reason instead of many reason.
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
Thank you Gii! I will tweek my listing for sure! I appreciate you looking at my listing and for the advice.
I need it since it's my first go at this
Reply Like Delete
C C
C C9 months ago
When that happens at my house, I chase them down the street with a broom. Doesn't anybody have a mother anymore?!
Reply Liked 3 likes Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
So unacceptable. And clearly there was a lack of respect. He wanted a rise out of me, and absolutely ruined my first experience. But now ( because of you all) I have tweeked my listings and am ready for my next guest! Who I know will be wonderful.
Thank you all so much for your help. I needed this
Reply Like Delete
David
David9 months ago
Very sorry to hear this. All my worst, worst experiences happened in first month. I am glad, it kind of gave me a jolt, I upped my rules and make a pledge that now I had evicted one guest, any more would be easy as i'd tolerate even less, and give them less chances.
Had one very strange guy who 'pleasured himself' all over a glass side table, up the wall and left a sock he used to mop it up. Disgusting. I think some people like to shock and in your case intimidate which is seriously messed up and out of order. Hope Airbnb strike him off.
Reply Like Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
I hope so too. You better believe my review for him will be honest.
Wow I cannot believe that all of you have experienced things like this. It's crazy, but we open up our homes, our safe spaces and want to share them with others while making some extra income. I just think about how I would behave in someone else's home and it baffles me when people do not maintain mutual respect.
Again thank you for your stories and sharing your advice with me.
Maybe I need to be less forgiving and up my rules.
Reply Like 1 reply Delete
David
David9 months ago
Sorry i do not know you, so please forgive me here. But I kind of beg you to up your rules, lol. I have been doing this a year now. there are a very tiny handful of individuals who will take any advantage they see. You seem very trusting from reading your profile, but I personally would seriously add some rules. Again apologies if this reads as inappropriate advice.
Deborah
Deborah9 months ago
Prevention is the best approach to horrid guests. Best to try to avoid getting them in the first place, though it isn't possible to prevent all nasty people, there are some techniques that help.
First, take a look at these links, which I have put into the welcome message that all those who join this forum are getting, because these are bits of info that can be very helpful to new hosts:
My posts on tips for new hosts
www.airbnb.com/groups/content/content-116888
My post on red flags for hosts
www.airbnb.com/groups/content/content-94737
Second, as David mentioned, in my opinion it very much prevents getting bad guests, if you have a good solid list of house rules, and come across as somewhat strict in your rules. THis just gives the impression that you are not someone to be messed with, and that anyone who is blatantly disrespectful or defiant of your house rules, will find themselves out on the street in short order. Take a look at my house rules and feel free to copy them. ALso look at the rules of other regular and experienced forum members/hosts.
I have noticed that a considerable proportion of those who have had serious problems with guests, are women, often young women. It's quite possible that some guests who INTEND to damage the premises, violate rules, or harass or do creepy things to hosts, intentionally choose to stay with women, or young women, or perhaps with hosts who seem inexperienced, naive, or who have few or no house rules, which conveys that they haven't thought much about potential problems.
Though we all wish that all human beings would be decent and fair and kind, particularly if we are generous and invite them to stay with us, this just isn't reality. Most guests are good and respectful, but there are going to be the creeps, and you want to learn how to avoid them.
Speaking of creeps, here's an AIrbnb horror story that just recently unfolded in my state:
bit.ly/1JP9fZa
Reply Like 1 reply•1 like Delete
Deborah
Deborah9 months ago
bit.ly/1JP9fZa
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
Thank you SO much Deborah for your advice. It is much appreciated. I will do whatever in my power to prevent this from happening again.
Reply Like Delete
C C
C C9 months ago
I'm a mean old lady & that stops a lot of nonsense (I have virtually none to deal with, really) but if I were a young woman & I had room, I'd get me a trustworthy male permanent/semi-permanent roommate.
Reply Like 1 like Delete
C C
C C9 months ago
*And still do Airbnb
Reply Like Delete
Sonja
Sonja9 months ago
Disgusting! What was his initial communication like? In the beginning I actually decided not to host men at all but now I judge the requests case by case.
One guy asked to stay a couple of nights and in our first few
Messages he didn't go into detail why he wanted to come to London, but then he asked me why I was a 'single yummy mummy'. I declined him and didn't message him back. Afterwards I noticed that Al his reviews had come from single female hosts, one mentioned he'd turned up at her place with wine... Sorry but sometimes it's right to be suspicious!
Reply Liked 1 reply•1 like Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
It was absolutely disgusting. He had minimal communication but nothing I saw as uncomfortable or creepy. I have decided not to host men traveling alone while I stay here. Even when I met him when he arrived, he did not seem crazy. But what he did in my home was absolutely unacceptable. Leaving semen on my floor, wanting me to catch him jerking off. The doors to that room are glass french doors. So its so OBVIOUS that its see-through. Catching him once, I was willing to forgive. But he stayed up all night. He messaged me in the middle of the night saying "Thanks for being cool about it, I'll keep quiet as long as its cool"…. meaning what?!?! at 6am, I found him still sitting at my desk, jerking off. I immediately left and messaged him to leave the keys on the counter and go. Thankfully he left right away. I have never used bleached so much in my life.
C C
C C9 months ago
I'm seeing the first advantage so far of being old!
Reply Like 1 reply•1 like Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
I have reconfigured my house rules now and will tone down being overly friendly. I think from now on, I need to be myself but be more careful. This is my home after all. And thats the most upsetting part. He wanted me to catch him. I cannot believe I was in the unit the whole time he was defiling my room. What a horrid first experience. I met my next guest this morning- who is an absolute peach. He and his fiancé hopefully will redeem this situation. I'm an old lady at heart…if that counts haha. I'm going to be way more careful.
C C
C C9 months ago
Could have been even worse too. An idiot and a danger
Reply Like 1 like Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
He just messaged me again, asking if my review for him was positive… HAHAHA in your dreams sir.
Reply Liked 1 reply•2 likes Delete
Fiona
Fiona9 months ago
Positively horrible!
C C
C C9 months ago
Yeah, it counts! Lol
Reply Like Delete
C C
C C9 months ago
If he had time to have any dreams....
Reply Like 1 like Delete
Susan
Susan9 months ago
I was just mentally writing the House Rules to address this egregious behavior.
Reply Like 3 replies•1 like Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
I just reworked my house rules for both my listings. And I'm hoping that helps to weed out despicable behavior such as what I dealt with.
Jeannette
Jeannette9 months ago
"No jerking off." :: helpin' you out there Susan. :: thank me later! ::
Susan
Susan9 months ago
I was leaning more toward "Masturbation Manifest", actually regulating the activity rather than forbidding it. It would be kind of the honor system but any guest who abused (note pun) the House Rules would go blind, allowing me to implement the Jerk Off Jerk HazMat Clean Up fee.
C C
C C9 months ago
Go in & say 'any reason' instead of many reason & say vaping instead of vamping
Reply Like Delete
Penny
Penny9 months ago
Sara, your first experience is absolutely horrid. I am glad you involved AirBnB and the police!
As a host on Couch surfing and AirBnB For over 7 years your safety has to come sevondary to accepting a booking.
In Melbourne I often meet up for coffee with other female in-home hosts to share my knowledge and I often post tips on the forum. We have also had specific in-home host meet ups both men and women so we can learn from each other.
It's important that we are friendly and stay true to ourselves but if you are comfortable using humour it often works to convey strict ideas and bring up issues or set up expectations.
My biggest piece of advice would be to avoid using instant book, have control of who stays in your place. It looks great! The majority of my experiences have been awesome and that's because of the guests I choose but more importantly the ones I reject.
Reply Like Delete
Andrew
Andrew9 months ago
Sara - your guest has a fetish that is not terribly common but depressingly well-known to hotel housekeepers. It's one that should be acted out in consensual role-play scenarios, and to make you a party to it against your will is sexual harrassment. You did the right thing by reporting it. An honest review is well deserved, but actually this is a more extreme case and Airbnb really should ban him outright. (Not sure how much the police can do, as I don't think indecent-exposure laws apply inside the home).
My first piece of advice would be to get yourself to a hardware store and buy some translucent adhesive film for the glass on those French doors. A simple one with a frosted effect is sufficient to let light in but provide privacy. It's unlikely that you'll have this exact situation again, but still, it shouldn't be possible to see into the guestroom with the door closed - that will make most guests very uncomfortable, and also lead you to see more things you didn't wish to. That particular problem, easily solved.
I can see how this experience will make you more uncomfortable with solo male travelers, which is a shame - the vast majority are not like this. If you have a lockable private area to yourself in the house and available support in the event of trouble with an aggressive guest, most of your potential safety concerns are covered. But there are a lot of single women hosts in this group, and I hope some of them share their tips for keeping yourself safe, communicating and enforcing your boundaries. We men really suck at being human sometimes, and I wouldn't be surprised if the text indicating that you are a woman living alone in the house makes your place more appealing to those bad apples.
I can also say, you will likely have many fantastic experiences in the future. Most of my guests have truly been a pleasure to host, and several have become good friends as well.
Reply Like 1 reply•3 likes Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
Thanks Andrew. I appreciate your perspective. And great idea for the glass french doors! I'll get to home depot asap and grab some. I think this will be a great solution for extra privacy. This forum has been extremely helpful. And has put me at great ease.
Renee
Renee9 months ago
The frosted effect is also available in spray can method at Lowe's or HD. I found film a struggle to work with!
Reply Like 1 reply Delete
Andrew
Andrew9 months ago
Is the spray easy to remove?
Deborah
Deborah9 months ago
I concur with Andrew that this situation you experienced should be regarded as sexual harassment. You might use that term in your review of the guest.
Reply Like Delete
Pamela
Pamela9 months ago
My second guest literally left fish behind, live ones, and it took me a week to find them the right home. I should have flushed them. Instead, I added fish to my no pets policy.
Reply Liked 3 likes Delete
Laura
Laura9 months ago
I don't feel comfortable accepting men on their own, I know that is unfair to the vast majority of male travellers. But would just prefer to host women or couples. I am really sorry this happened to you. Please can you make it clear what happened to you so noone else has the misfortune to host him.
Reply Like 1 reply Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
I made it really clear in his review, reported him to airbnb and to my local police department. I feel like I've done all I can now, just need to move forward and hope for much better more respectful guests! I've learned so much in this forum- seriously. I feel way more prepared to continue being a host
C C
C C9 months ago
Lol! I'm the opposite. I've hosted lots of women & of course still will, but before I knew about Airbnb & no one was tracking me or could track me, I had already learned & would not even consider renting to a woman & said whatever to dissuade them! Women are so much more picky than men on the whole!!! Yes, there are exceptions. But I've had very few problems with any renters, and I think it's because of my one real rule: don't rent to women!!! I've done ok with Airbnb women, but still breathe easier when my bookings come from men! Lol!
www.airbnb.com/groups/content/content-135080
Sara shared 9 months ago on New Hosts Forum
How to deal with a horrid guest
My first airbnb guest was actually a total nightmare. Has anyone dealt with that before? I can share details but it was worse than being messy or breaking my things. Much worse. I had to report him not only to airbnb but to the evanston police.
I have many upcoming bookings so I will continue to be a gracious, wonderful and accommodating host because I want my guests to have a beautiful stay in my home. But is there any advice out there?
29 comments•1 like
Following
Like
C C
Delete
Hide
C C
C C9 months ago
Sara, that is such a rare thing & i HATE that happened on your first reservation. When you host a lot more, you'll realize how super-nice most people are, & this will fade as a memory (although it sounds extremely dire!). I had one guest, nowhere near what you're dealing with, but she cried when she arrived because she was "scared" but then realized it was actually a good place & next refused to leave & I had to threaten her with police. But most people are good people & that's really the take-away for me with Airbnb. It has affirmed my belief in people, not ruined it. I had another just outrageously bad, legendary guest, but props to Airbnb for their support! I'm so sorry, again. Don't quit
Reply Like Delete
Gii
Gii9 months ago
That's horrible :-) hoping you are okay.
Looking at your listing I would recommend retracting the mention of how you are gone most of the time. There are some unruly guests with bad intentions and this might bait them a little. Perhaps instead mention more of what is involved in the check-in process and how you will make them feel welcome, that they have their own privacy but you are there to address anything or if they want company.
I am a young female and I think this alone can attract untoward behaviour (I've had a few bizarre requests through AirBnB!) so I communicate with guests prior to their stay to gauge the reason for the visit, whether they have used AirBnB before, and asking them to familiarise themselves with the house rules so they understand what your expectations are and the etiquette that must exist on AirBnB as a platform.
Your listing is great and I think you will attract many wonderful guests, it's just a matter of making minor adjustments in your listing and communicating with the guest more prior to their stay.
Reply Like 2 likes Delete
Gii
Gii9 months ago
Oops it wasn't supposed to be :-) it was intended to be a sad face I'm sorry
Reply Like Delete
Stan & Maggie
Stan & Maggie9 months ago
So sorry this happened :-( but well done for contacting the police! Curious to know what they did! Also was this an instant booking? My initial advice is to tweak your profile to seem less 'single' and remove the college reference,
BTW I used to live close to the original Lush store! Maggie
Reply Like Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
Thank you Cheyenne! I just knew this was an unlucky situation. He stayed up all night and jerked off. I caught him and then he messaged me hoping I would catch him again and again. Like he got off from me catching him. He left semen on my floor and I just couldn't believe this happened to me.
But I want to be a host. I want to share my home with people.
So I won't quit.
Thank you for your advice!
Reply Like 1 reply•1 like Delete
C C
C C9 months ago
Sara, i saw where u changed vamping to vaping. Where u say dont take my possessions out... change to for 'any' reason instead of many reason.
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
Thank you Gii! I will tweek my listing for sure! I appreciate you looking at my listing and for the advice.
I need it since it's my first go at this
Reply Like Delete
C C
C C9 months ago
When that happens at my house, I chase them down the street with a broom. Doesn't anybody have a mother anymore?!
Reply Liked 3 likes Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
So unacceptable. And clearly there was a lack of respect. He wanted a rise out of me, and absolutely ruined my first experience. But now ( because of you all) I have tweeked my listings and am ready for my next guest! Who I know will be wonderful.
Thank you all so much for your help. I needed this
Reply Like Delete
David
David9 months ago
Very sorry to hear this. All my worst, worst experiences happened in first month. I am glad, it kind of gave me a jolt, I upped my rules and make a pledge that now I had evicted one guest, any more would be easy as i'd tolerate even less, and give them less chances.
Had one very strange guy who 'pleasured himself' all over a glass side table, up the wall and left a sock he used to mop it up. Disgusting. I think some people like to shock and in your case intimidate which is seriously messed up and out of order. Hope Airbnb strike him off.
Reply Like Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
I hope so too. You better believe my review for him will be honest.
Wow I cannot believe that all of you have experienced things like this. It's crazy, but we open up our homes, our safe spaces and want to share them with others while making some extra income. I just think about how I would behave in someone else's home and it baffles me when people do not maintain mutual respect.
Again thank you for your stories and sharing your advice with me.
Maybe I need to be less forgiving and up my rules.
Reply Like 1 reply Delete
David
David9 months ago
Sorry i do not know you, so please forgive me here. But I kind of beg you to up your rules, lol. I have been doing this a year now. there are a very tiny handful of individuals who will take any advantage they see. You seem very trusting from reading your profile, but I personally would seriously add some rules. Again apologies if this reads as inappropriate advice.
Deborah
Deborah9 months ago
Prevention is the best approach to horrid guests. Best to try to avoid getting them in the first place, though it isn't possible to prevent all nasty people, there are some techniques that help.
First, take a look at these links, which I have put into the welcome message that all those who join this forum are getting, because these are bits of info that can be very helpful to new hosts:
My posts on tips for new hosts
www.airbnb.com/groups/content/content-116888
My post on red flags for hosts
www.airbnb.com/groups/content/content-94737
Second, as David mentioned, in my opinion it very much prevents getting bad guests, if you have a good solid list of house rules, and come across as somewhat strict in your rules. THis just gives the impression that you are not someone to be messed with, and that anyone who is blatantly disrespectful or defiant of your house rules, will find themselves out on the street in short order. Take a look at my house rules and feel free to copy them. ALso look at the rules of other regular and experienced forum members/hosts.
I have noticed that a considerable proportion of those who have had serious problems with guests, are women, often young women. It's quite possible that some guests who INTEND to damage the premises, violate rules, or harass or do creepy things to hosts, intentionally choose to stay with women, or young women, or perhaps with hosts who seem inexperienced, naive, or who have few or no house rules, which conveys that they haven't thought much about potential problems.
Though we all wish that all human beings would be decent and fair and kind, particularly if we are generous and invite them to stay with us, this just isn't reality. Most guests are good and respectful, but there are going to be the creeps, and you want to learn how to avoid them.
Speaking of creeps, here's an AIrbnb horror story that just recently unfolded in my state:
bit.ly/1JP9fZa
Reply Like 1 reply•1 like Delete
Deborah
Deborah9 months ago
bit.ly/1JP9fZa
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
Thank you SO much Deborah for your advice. It is much appreciated. I will do whatever in my power to prevent this from happening again.
Reply Like Delete
C C
C C9 months ago
I'm a mean old lady & that stops a lot of nonsense (I have virtually none to deal with, really) but if I were a young woman & I had room, I'd get me a trustworthy male permanent/semi-permanent roommate.
Reply Like 1 like Delete
C C
C C9 months ago
*And still do Airbnb
Reply Like Delete
Sonja
Sonja9 months ago
Disgusting! What was his initial communication like? In the beginning I actually decided not to host men at all but now I judge the requests case by case.
One guy asked to stay a couple of nights and in our first few
Messages he didn't go into detail why he wanted to come to London, but then he asked me why I was a 'single yummy mummy'. I declined him and didn't message him back. Afterwards I noticed that Al his reviews had come from single female hosts, one mentioned he'd turned up at her place with wine... Sorry but sometimes it's right to be suspicious!
Reply Liked 1 reply•1 like Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
It was absolutely disgusting. He had minimal communication but nothing I saw as uncomfortable or creepy. I have decided not to host men traveling alone while I stay here. Even when I met him when he arrived, he did not seem crazy. But what he did in my home was absolutely unacceptable. Leaving semen on my floor, wanting me to catch him jerking off. The doors to that room are glass french doors. So its so OBVIOUS that its see-through. Catching him once, I was willing to forgive. But he stayed up all night. He messaged me in the middle of the night saying "Thanks for being cool about it, I'll keep quiet as long as its cool"…. meaning what?!?! at 6am, I found him still sitting at my desk, jerking off. I immediately left and messaged him to leave the keys on the counter and go. Thankfully he left right away. I have never used bleached so much in my life.
C C
C C9 months ago
I'm seeing the first advantage so far of being old!
Reply Like 1 reply•1 like Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
I have reconfigured my house rules now and will tone down being overly friendly. I think from now on, I need to be myself but be more careful. This is my home after all. And thats the most upsetting part. He wanted me to catch him. I cannot believe I was in the unit the whole time he was defiling my room. What a horrid first experience. I met my next guest this morning- who is an absolute peach. He and his fiancé hopefully will redeem this situation. I'm an old lady at heart…if that counts haha. I'm going to be way more careful.
C C
C C9 months ago
Could have been even worse too. An idiot and a danger
Reply Like 1 like Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
He just messaged me again, asking if my review for him was positive… HAHAHA in your dreams sir.
Reply Liked 1 reply•2 likes Delete
Fiona
Fiona9 months ago
Positively horrible!
C C
C C9 months ago
Yeah, it counts! Lol
Reply Like Delete
C C
C C9 months ago
If he had time to have any dreams....
Reply Like 1 like Delete
Susan
Susan9 months ago
I was just mentally writing the House Rules to address this egregious behavior.
Reply Like 3 replies•1 like Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
I just reworked my house rules for both my listings. And I'm hoping that helps to weed out despicable behavior such as what I dealt with.
Jeannette
Jeannette9 months ago
"No jerking off." :: helpin' you out there Susan. :: thank me later! ::
Susan
Susan9 months ago
I was leaning more toward "Masturbation Manifest", actually regulating the activity rather than forbidding it. It would be kind of the honor system but any guest who abused (note pun) the House Rules would go blind, allowing me to implement the Jerk Off Jerk HazMat Clean Up fee.
C C
C C9 months ago
Go in & say 'any reason' instead of many reason & say vaping instead of vamping
Reply Like Delete
Penny
Penny9 months ago
Sara, your first experience is absolutely horrid. I am glad you involved AirBnB and the police!
As a host on Couch surfing and AirBnB For over 7 years your safety has to come sevondary to accepting a booking.
In Melbourne I often meet up for coffee with other female in-home hosts to share my knowledge and I often post tips on the forum. We have also had specific in-home host meet ups both men and women so we can learn from each other.
It's important that we are friendly and stay true to ourselves but if you are comfortable using humour it often works to convey strict ideas and bring up issues or set up expectations.
My biggest piece of advice would be to avoid using instant book, have control of who stays in your place. It looks great! The majority of my experiences have been awesome and that's because of the guests I choose but more importantly the ones I reject.
Reply Like Delete
Andrew
Andrew9 months ago
Sara - your guest has a fetish that is not terribly common but depressingly well-known to hotel housekeepers. It's one that should be acted out in consensual role-play scenarios, and to make you a party to it against your will is sexual harrassment. You did the right thing by reporting it. An honest review is well deserved, but actually this is a more extreme case and Airbnb really should ban him outright. (Not sure how much the police can do, as I don't think indecent-exposure laws apply inside the home).
My first piece of advice would be to get yourself to a hardware store and buy some translucent adhesive film for the glass on those French doors. A simple one with a frosted effect is sufficient to let light in but provide privacy. It's unlikely that you'll have this exact situation again, but still, it shouldn't be possible to see into the guestroom with the door closed - that will make most guests very uncomfortable, and also lead you to see more things you didn't wish to. That particular problem, easily solved.
I can see how this experience will make you more uncomfortable with solo male travelers, which is a shame - the vast majority are not like this. If you have a lockable private area to yourself in the house and available support in the event of trouble with an aggressive guest, most of your potential safety concerns are covered. But there are a lot of single women hosts in this group, and I hope some of them share their tips for keeping yourself safe, communicating and enforcing your boundaries. We men really suck at being human sometimes, and I wouldn't be surprised if the text indicating that you are a woman living alone in the house makes your place more appealing to those bad apples.
I can also say, you will likely have many fantastic experiences in the future. Most of my guests have truly been a pleasure to host, and several have become good friends as well.
Reply Like 1 reply•3 likes Delete
Sara
Sara 9 months ago
Thanks Andrew. I appreciate your perspective. And great idea for the glass french doors! I'll get to home depot asap and grab some. I think this will be a great solution for extra privacy. This forum has been extremely helpful. And has put me at great ease.
Renee
Renee9 months ago
The frosted effect is also available in spray can method at Lowe's or HD. I found film a struggle to work with!
Reply Like 1 reply Delete
Andrew
Andrew9 months ago
Is the spray easy to remove?
Deborah
Deborah9 months ago
I concur with Andrew that this situation you experienced should be regarded as sexual harassment. You might use that term in your review of the guest.
Reply Like Delete
Pamela
Pamela9 months ago
My second guest literally left fish behind, live ones, and it took me a week to find them the right home. I should have flushed them. Instead, I added fish to my no pets policy.
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Laura
Laura9 months ago
I don't feel comfortable accepting men on their own, I know that is unfair to the vast majority of male travellers. But would just prefer to host women or couples. I am really sorry this happened to you. Please can you make it clear what happened to you so noone else has the misfortune to host him.
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Sara
Sara 9 months ago
I made it really clear in his review, reported him to airbnb and to my local police department. I feel like I've done all I can now, just need to move forward and hope for much better more respectful guests! I've learned so much in this forum- seriously. I feel way more prepared to continue being a host
C C
C C9 months ago
Lol! I'm the opposite. I've hosted lots of women & of course still will, but before I knew about Airbnb & no one was tracking me or could track me, I had already learned & would not even consider renting to a woman & said whatever to dissuade them! Women are so much more picky than men on the whole!!! Yes, there are exceptions. But I've had very few problems with any renters, and I think it's because of my one real rule: don't rent to women!!! I've done ok with Airbnb women, but still breathe easier when my bookings come from men! Lol!